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Raised by Wolves

Gaki: writing myself Real

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Gir deactivated

Son of a bitch! Shit! This is a -- fuck!

Behind on the writing -- as usual! And I have a review that by now is uber-late, so of course I'm writing ABOUT it instead of writing it. I'm just taxed; I can't think in any more straight lines today.

On the plus side, after I got back from a couple weeks of vacation, I got given my own project at work. I'm actually in charge of producing and designing a video game -- yeah, I'm as surprised as you! Given that I once considered the purpose of work to be saving up enough money to not work for a few months, I am elated, perplexed, and a little discomfited. The guy in the mirror keeps changing. He could change into someone I really dislike, if I don't pay attention to him pretty damn closely. (We barely get along as it is!)

On the down side -- the nature of the work itself. My entire consciousness is slowly uploading itself into Excel. I'm green, and therefore nervous, and when I try to sleep, task lists and deliverable dependencies keep picking at me, taking little bloody chunks of my brain and cackling gleefully in my ear.

Furthermore -- and it's true for all games, but never gets less painful -- you start with your wish list of the ultimate, glorious thing you want to build -- and then tear it down brick by brick as the realities of budgeting and scheduling creep in, until what you've got left is the feather-light husk of the dream you were asked to envision in the first place. Look at me and my happy husk. Make it wave to the crowd with it's brittle arms, held together by the lightest of chitinous layers. Make it do a happy hollow dance, and then lock it in a trunk and build another one. Sometimes people come by and tell you you've got three less weeks than they told you before, so finish hollowing faster! You can't make it breathe again, but maybe if you give it a hat and a cane -- okay, this metaphor is stretched pretty thin, but you get the point.

It's a learning experience, and I am learning. I would so much rather be plotting out storylines, characters, concepts -- yeah yeah, I just want to make other people build all my UNBELIEVABLY GENIUS ideas for me. But you'd enjoy them, I swear!

Fooding would be good. Then more Ar Tonelico, or finish watching Audition.

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I was reading on 'source aging' on Wired

Think it was wired....anyway, they imply every magazine in the US targets a demographic age, understanding that their real readers will be three years younger than that, struggling to prove they are cool enough to run with the age activities of their future lives.

So target 15 year olds with drama for 18 year olds, and you'll be set. Apparently. Hope that helps!

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